Comparison is the thief of joy

Many people compare themselves to others and see that others are doing better, are more pretty or handsome, are richer (seem to be anyway), are more popular, are smarter, etc.  This makes them feel bad about themselves, OR, it brings out envy, jealousy, and feelings of unfairness.

While others can show us what is possible and inspire us, we need to check ourselves when we feel our thoughts spiral downward as a result of comparison.

Compare yourself to your own potential, and to who you were yesterday.  If you still feel bad, then you need to do better, and it’s on you.  If you feel good, keep going and get even better tomorrow. 

Too Many Options?

Free markets allow anyone who thinks they have a better idea and wants to give it a try to start their own business with their own brand and style of product or service.  The products and services consumers like get purchased, and if enough consumers purchase them, the business survives.  If not enough consumers like them, the business goes bankrupt and goes away – as it should.  This clears the “deadwood” in the marketplace, and producers learn from the failures.

This produces a wide variety of products and services.  It produced technology, where we can shop the world from home.  We can meet people and interact from our devices anywhere we are.  We have unlimited entertainment options.  We have the opportunity to craft the life experience we want based on what we choose to pay attention to.

It also creates a problem.  Were our brains made for all these options?  The answer is no.  We can have decision fatigue if we feel we have to look at and consider them all.  We can second guess ourselves.  We can become overloaded.  We can become seduced by messages, advertising and “news” that consume much of our time.  

I think we have to approach this abundance with a healthy sense of what direction we want to go and who we want to be, and let it accelerate our progress instead of distract us from it.

I may have a monkey mind – but I am the monkey, and the monkey should remember to stay in charge of his life. 

Fuzzy targets lead to bad mental outcomes

When I don’t have a clear goal, I am wandering, wondering, searching, confused, bored and/or depressed.

People who are clear on who they want to be (to whom),  and what they want to do walk with a purpose and are happier and self-motivated.

Clarity for yourself.

Are you clear about what you are moving toward?

On Loss….

In my observation, we all experience loss.  When we are kids, everything and everyone is new – a gain.  But the longer we live, the more loss we will experience.  People will leave us.  Situations we thought were permanent, are not.  Expectations unmet.  Since it is inevitable, we should, if we can, develop a workable approach and attitude toward loss.

Here are some thoughts on the subject –

“There’s always failure.  And there’s always disappointment.  And there’s always loss. But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.” – Michael J. Fox

“If you sit down crying because the sun has set, you miss the privilege of seeing the stars.  Sorrow for what you have lost should not make you neglect that which comes in its place.” – Rabindranath Tagore

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.  These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern.  Beautiful people do not just happen.” – Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Has life on earth gotten better or worse from 1990-2020?

What is your answer?

There are some who say things are getting worse.  What do you say?

Well, here are some statistics of what happened between 1990 and 2020 – 

Global life expectancy increased from 64 years to 73 years.

The percentage of children who die before the age of five decreased from 9.3% to 3.7%.  Despite a significantly larger population today, this means that almost 7.5 million fewer children die annually compared with the early 1990’s. 

Deaths from mothers giving birth dropped by 55%.

The proportion of the world population receiving basic education has skyrocketed and the illiteracy rates have almost halved: from 25.7% to 13.5%.  In the age group 15-24. illiteracy is now just over 8%. 

Child labor in the 5-17 age group decreased from 16% to just under 10%.

The number of people globally living in extreme poverty dropped from 38% to now just 8.4%.  For the first time in history, fewer than one in ten people were poor.  Despite the fact that world population increased by more than 1.1 billion people.  According to Johan Norberg in his book “The Capitalist Manifesto”, that is the greatest thing that has ever happened to mankind.  The relentless hardship that most of humanity has suffered throughout its existence has been pushed back faster than ever and in more places than ever.”

This progress has not come because of any government planning or welfare program.  It came by unlocking the ingenuity and effort of people with economic freedom and open markets, including across borders.

I don’t attribute many things to luck.  But that we were born at this time – well, that’s plain luck. 

Rockets and paper airplanes

If you are going up, there are many people around you now that are not coming with you.

They won’t; it’s not their choice, and that’s ok.

You will have to leave them behind if you are to move forward.

You will have to say no.  You will have to spend less time with them. 

You will have to break away from their influence and open time for being influenced by other more valuable voices.

It’s not to say you don’t love them/like them or never want to see them again or to burn any bridges at all.  You don’t have to make any declaration to anyone.

It’s simply recognizing that where you are is not all there is for you, and improving yourself by how and where you spend your time.

Upgrade your standards

What bothers you?  What makes life difficult and no fun?

What if you upgraded your standards of what you will allow in your life – even from yourself?

Prove your worth to yourself.

Level up.

A sense of control in our lives

Freedom and free market economies give citizens a sense of control over their lives.  We have choices and the freedom to make them.

Imagine if you had little choice of where to work, or what kind of work to do.  Imagine if you had little choice of what food to eat or clothes to wear.  Imagine if you had little choice of where to live, or if little entertainment were available.

The double dose of freedom and capitalism have given us a sense of control over our lives, and that has made us far happier.

Positive thinking

When I was 19 years old I discovered Nightengale Conant audio programs.  They cost $60 in 1983 for a six-cassette set, which was a lot of money for me.  But I invested in myself and was always listening as I drove anywhere.  Zig Ziglar was a speaker and sales trainer whom I admired a lot.  He had many easy-to-understand insights that helped me very much to make sense of the world.  Here is one of them – 

“Positive thinking won’t let you do ANYTHING.  But it will let you do EVERYTHING better than negative thinking will.” – Zig Ziglar

Right now, are you thinking positively about the things you will do today, or negatively?

You are where you want to be.

If you have been where you are for a while, then it’s where you want to be.  If it wasn’t, then you would have changed it by now.

If it’s not exactly how you want it to be, then you want to be here more than you want to do the work or expend the energy to change.  You’re resigned to your spot.  If that’s ok with you, great.

Human beings are unstoppable if we get a vision in our head, commit to it, and become obsessed with taking action.  You can create something else – IF you want it more than anything.

What do you want more than anything?  What you have – or something different?

We are incredibly fortunate that we live in a free society and in this era where we can even bother with such questions, let alone carry them out.

I will not waste this opportunity.

How about you?