When disadvantages are advantages

Many of us say we have disadvantages that put us behind and make it harder for us to be successful.

A poor family growing up, dyslexia, a physical handicap, a less than ideal school, a tough neighborhood, friends who made really bad choices, rough parents, and so much more.  

Sure, these things may be no fun at the time, and for some, leave a mark forever.  But perhaps more often, what these conditions do to us and how they shape our character can be considered strengths.  You can be more resilient, smarter in that way, or street wise. While one personal characteristic is missing, others are sharpened. Or maybe you just know what you DON’T want and/or have developed a burning desire for what you DO want.

What “disadvantages” did you have?  How are these advantages now or in your future? 

They can see it on your face

A sour face comes from sour thoughts.

People can tell what you are thinking in general, and they act accordingly.

Look in the mirror.  What would people say you’re thinking about?

What if I fail?

A victim asks this question out of fear, and tries to justify his failure to try.

A victor asks this question to understand the consequences, make an informed decision, and to chase away fear by deciding in advance to be willing to accept failure.  The victor ALSO asks, “What if I succeed?” to motivate himself, and weighs the answer against his greater goals.

Weigh your options –  as a victor.

The Mind-Body Connection

There is a clear link between the mind and the body.  What you believe and how you think will affect how you behave and perform and feel.  

Change your mind, change your life.

What do YOU think of you?

We wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of us if we knew how little they did.

The important thing is what you think of yourself.

You are always watching.  Make yourself proud.

Happiness is an attitude

We all know people who have every reason to be happy and are not, and people who have every reason to be unhappy and are not.  

It’s not the circumstances, it’s the attitude.

How about you?

Incomplete families cause financial hardship

Let’s talk.

Scenario #1 – Man meets woman, they fall in love, both work, they get married and move into household “A” and have children.  Either one of them stops working to care for the children or they both continue to work and pay for daycare. Things are great.

Scenario #2 – Man meets woman, they fall in love, both work, they get married (or not) and move into household “A” and have children.  Then they split up, he moves out and moves into household “B”, which he cannot afford while paying for child support and alimony back at household “A”.  She likely cannot afford day care so stops working to care for the children on very little income. No fun for anybody.

They both struggle financially supporting two households (likely on one income) and have to reduce their standard of living. (Obviously a one-parent household is not ideal for the children in most cases).

What is my point?  I would not give advice on divorce – I’m sure there are some people that should not be together.  But this is how it turns out financially in most cases and it should be well known so (young) people can do whatever they can to avoid getting into this position in the first place.

Cause voluntary change in your life

If you can’t change voluntarily, then one day you will have to change involuntarily, no matter how much you don’t like it or doubt you can survive it.

Can you discipline yourself to change, and stick it out, through the transition for the better?

Take your foot off the brake

While we like to blame other people and circumstances for our problems and why our dreams didn’t come true, its really us holding ourselves back.

In what way do you have your foot on the brake of a really great life or experience?

The eye of the innovator

To see what everyone else sees, and think what nobody else thinks.

What do you think?

Take action.