Be tough on you.

For many years, and even now, each day I made sure I did what I had to to get better, not mess up, and live up to my commitments, and more.  I learned how to do this better and better, especially by making mistakes.  I made it a habit.  Then the habit of being self-disciplined made it easier to be self-disciplined.

If you are tough on yourself, then life, work, and other people will be far easier on you.

If you want independence, you have to be self-disciplined.