A dealer of mine told us about a disappointment and frustration he has. In the last three years his life has changed quite a bit. You see, he has become very successful compared to the many years before that.
What’s the problem? His friends have become quite judgemental and envious. They’d tease him jokingly that he was a “big shot” now, that he was a “rich guy” and many versions of the same theme.
Let’s take out the possibility that he may feel like he is better than others and talk down to people or differently to them. This would be a mistake on his part, but I don’t think it’s what is happening here.
The reason people would act differently towards you when you become successful is that your old friends liked you the way you were. People like people who are like them. Now, with their old friend presiding over a much bigger business, they assume you are different than they are. Their jokes about you becoming a big shot are partly jokes and partly envy, jealousy, and rejection of what they do not understand.
Becoming a “success” when you weren’t before is not easy. There is what it takes to get there, and what it takes to adjust to being a different kind of person. Some others around you will not adjust, and you may have to find some new friends who like the new you or who aren’t all awkward about it.
Sometimes others just need to get used to it. When they find out you are still the guy they knew and you haven’t changed because you are successful now, they will settle down and accept you with your new and better condition.
The worst thing to do is to self-sabotage and throw away your success because others around you, and you yourself, could not accept a more prosperous you.
I feel like this is about me. I’m not sure I talked to you about this. But my old life and old friends are all gone now and I have been rejected now. I was telling Jim Grueb I think about that.
Preach!